We all experience unhappiness at one point or another. However, contrary to popular belief, the problem isn’t actually our upbringing, relationships, education, lack of productive work, or the fear of being rejected. So, what is the source of this problem? Well, you’ll see.

Aristotle once said that “Happiness depends upon ourselves.” And while it’s true that 50% of our happiness is determined by our temperament, the remaining 50% is determined by our actions. For instance, if you are unhappy with your health, relationships, or career, it is important for you to recognize that you are in control and have the power to change it. If Aristotle, who lived in 300 B.C., came to the conclusion that happiness is something that we create from within and it’s not something that people or materialistic items give to us, it’s time that we realize this as well.

Here are 9 things that you, and only you, can do to improve your quality of life.

1. You should never liken acquisition with contentment.

Psychologists would refer to this as hedonistic adaptation, which is the tendency for humans to return to their normal state of happiness even though they have just gone through considerable positive or negative life changes or events.

To simplify, hedonistic adaptation is the reason that the initial feeling of excitement or fulfillment goes away shortly after you purchase, for instance, a new car, house or clothes. And the only way that one can reclaim that feeling is to make a new purchase, thus leading to a never-ending cycle.

But, the sooner the world realizes that real fulfillment comes from doing, rather than having, the better.

2. You should never mistake political gain for success.

Sure, fighting and trying to make yourself look better by putting others down can help put you ahead. That’s politics. But, if you do decide to play this game, just know you’ll end up losing sooner or later. Why? Because political achievement is solely based on impulse and unpredictable changes of other people. This means that what is successful today could be considered a failure tomorrow.

Real achievements are based on integrity. No one can take it away from you.

3. The fear of rejection or criticism should never stop you from working towards your goals.

No matter what you do, people are going to talk. So why not embrace it and try something new?

If you live your life trying to avoid critique or disapproval from those around you, you’ll end up living their lives and not the one that you want.

Try thinking of it this way: if people are talking about you, clearly you’re doing something right. There’s no such thing as bad press. Chances are people will admire you for doing what makes you happy and they’ll wish that they had the confidence to put their goals to the test.

4. It’s OK to be last. Slow and steady wins the race.

Have you ever heard the saying, ‘If you’re not first, you’re last’? Well, that’s not actually a bad thing.

Everyone wants to be first but that can make you lose sight of what’s important. Sometimes to win or get ahead, people will abandon their principles. 

In this world, there will always be someone who is smarter or more connected, but that doesn’t always mean that they will win the race. You should be the last person to give up on what’s important to you, and if you don’t succeed, you stuck to your principles. So who’s the real winner? You. 

5. Don’t wait around for that life-changing idea to hit you.

Chances are you won’t come up with a life-changing idea overnight – or at all.

Plus, even if you do, do you have the skills or backing to pull it off? Don’t feel bad, most don’t.

But do you know what you do have? An abundance of small ideas. If you act on these ideas, there’s no need to wait around for that big idea.

Remember: Happiness is an internal process, and only you can determine this process.

6. Don’t be afraid to put yourself or your ideas out there.

It’s all fun and games when we’re developing our ideas, but when the time comes to test them, we’re afraid that they will fail.

Sure, it might flop, but if you don’t put it out there for the world to see, it will never have the chance to take off. As Seth Godin says, there is no service or product that can be successful until it’s out in the field.

As mentioned, happiness is a process. If your idea sinks, you’ll know what to work on for the next time. Just don’t give up – you can’t be happy unless you put your true self out there.

7. Don’t base your life on creating the “perfect” resume.

If you pursue a job because you think that it will look good on your resume, you’re doing it wrong. Your resume simply reflects all that you’ve accomplished in life.

You shouldn’t revolve your life around creating the “perfect” resume. Focus more on achieving your hopes and dreams. If that makes you have a “winning” resume, great! If not, you’re doing what makes you happy, not the job recruiters.

8. Don’t wait around for something to happen.

Take advantage of every opportunity. Don’t sit on the sidelines and watch life pass you by.

What are you waiting for?

9. Don’t get it in your head that you’re unhappy.

Happiness is subjective. Picture this:

Everything that you take for granted on a daily basis is taken from you: Friends, family, career and even your home.

Now imagine that all of it is thrown off a cliff and is gone forever.

Would you feel distraught? Would you beg to get that life back? Would you realize that you were one of the lucky ones and that you had a pretty good thing going?

If you don’t think that you would and you’re still unhappy with your life, watch the movie ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’. Go on, I dare you.

Featured Image: depositphotos/stockasso